That is what the nurse told me and then the doctor when I arrived at the Emergency room the night before last. I was crying hysterically as my husband and our three children wheeled me into the ER. I had not been feeling myself since Russia. Mainly it started last weekend...flu like symptoms, headache, nausea...actually..it wasn't a big deal at first. I didn't think too much about it. Until the night before the ER visit, I ended up having a blinding migraine and horrific nausea and just felt awful. The next day (Thursday), I didn't feel much better. But, I started back to work this week and I had to put on my boot straps (as the saying goes) and not let my yukkie feelings get in the way. By the time my shift was over and M and N and I picked up Big Sis S...I was crumpled over. I am not sure how I drove home and thank goodness my husband was there to meet me at home. Because when I drove up in the driveway...I was crying hysterically and just fell out of the car. The pain in my stomach was awful.

B said instead of calling an ambulance, it would be easier for him to drive me. That was how bad the pain was. We thought an ambulance was needed. When I got there and the triage nurse saw me.... her comment to B was " you guys can't all fit in here, you will have to wait in the lobby" He said " she needs my help". The nurse said "she will be fine...she has to". She looked at me and told me to "just breathe, it is just mind over matter". If I was not in as much pain as I was in and if I was not a nice person..I probably would have reached over the desk and pulled all of her hair out!! WHAT????? JUST MIND OVER MATTER?!?! Ok...seriously...I know all of that psycho babble stuff. Yes, your mind has a lot to do with the pain factor. I have done yoga...I know how to breathe...I have taken Qi gong classes that helps you heal your body without medicne. So, I wanted to say "sister...don't sit there all high and mighty telling me to breathe when I feel like I have a two by four going straight through my stomach and through my back!".

I hate the ER. Sorry if you work in the ER out there my friends. But, from my experience...most of the nurses or rather the doctors are JADED. Unless you are dying on their table, they really want you out of there. They seem to automatically assume that nothing is really wrong with you. And I notice that as a woman..I don't get taken too seriously. If I were a man coming in there saying my chest hurt this week and I had severe stomach pain. Trust me, the doc would have been all in my business. Instead when he came in...he half heard me. He just kept saying 'uh huh, uh huh'. I know he was thinking about when his next break was.

People, people, people....I know that their might be some people that go to the ER at the drop of a hat. But, I have unfortunately seen it way too many times in the past year. 2 times this week... once with a migraine and the other with migraine and horrible stomach pains. They ran a CT scan and couldn't find anything. I left there in as much pain as I started out with. They were like "bye bye..don't let the door hit you in the rear"

So, yesterday..I went to my primary care and he is running some other tests. He said that I could have H Pylori that I could have picked up in Russia. I think it is a type of parasite or something. It also is a big factor in ulcers. So, I had even more blood tests taken. The sad part about it is, there has been no resolution. Tonight is Saturday night and I am still in a lot of pain. Now Blake is starting to show signs of having abdominal problems. So, I am not so sure we don't have a viral problem going on here.

So far, the kids are fine.

But, I just had to rant about the ER. The nurses are nice enough (sometimes). But, when you say that you are in a lot of pain, especially as a woman, in my experience...it seems as if they don't really believe you. And that really ticks me off. Because I don't have time to be visiting the ER for fun!!! I am not a drug seeker...I hate pain...I am a complete wuss when it comes to pain. I will do whatever I can to avoid it. I hate the ER. But, I find it a necessary evil when things get bad enough.

Anyway, I am just so frustrated that I cannot get my body back since my hysterectomy. Actually, I haven't gotten it back since the birth of our first daughter. My blood sugar is starting to go up...so, I am officially giving the South Beach Diet a try as of Monday. So, if any of you have ever been on it....let me know what you think. A friend from work said that was really helpful for her to control her diabetes ( I don't have that..but, want to avoid it). Her doctor put her on it. And i am officially going to take baby steps in working out. Start slowly in walking. I know that at my age...God could not have intended for me to be in this bad of shape and always getting sick. It drives me nuts!. Besides...when you have kids, you really can't take too much time off. Because they need you. And I want to be able to run and play with them a lot more than I am.

Enough for my rant. Just wanted to tell someone and that would explain my absense for the past couple of days. Hope everyone's weekend is going well!!

Caroline