My daughter's class is having a "Mother/Grandmother" Luncheon today to honor Mother's Day. She told me that everything was going to be a big surprise. Although she began to start leaking details, I had to put my fingers over my ears and tell her "Nope...I don't want to know". She said "Why?" I said that a surprise is when you don't tell anyone the secret. She said "Ok...I will just tell Dad" and started talking to him about our day :) Funny girl.
The whole Mother Day thing got me thinking though. I have several friends that have lost their mother over the course of the years and Mothers Day is a very painful time for them. Then, I have friends who are trying to concieve that are depressed when Mothers Day rolls around. Then, there are my friends who choose not to have children and feel left out of these Hallmark holidays. Then, there are my single friends who this day comes and goes for them.
The more that I thought about it, the more that I thought....we are all Mothers. Think about the time when you "mothered" your friend when they were going through a crisis. Or the time you "mothered" your significant other when they were going through an illness. OR the time when you stayed up all night on the phone with your close friend consoling them and "mothering" them after a bad break up. Or when you "mother" your pets. Some of us, more than most people consider their pet a child. Our Lilly (bulldog) is one of the kids. (Well, sort of..only on the days she is not snoring ;) And when you are pregnant...you are already "mothering" that baby inside of you. Or when you are preparing for an adoption...that child is growing in your heart. You may not even know where they are or how long it will be until you meet them. But, your heart is already a mother.
In saying all of this....this weekend...honor your mother, honor yourself, and honor your "inner mother". We are all Mothers, it just may look different to different people.
And to my own mother...I am so grateful for her. She has been there for me through thick and thin. She was sitting with Nikolai yesterday and told him that she wished she would be there when he grew up to see how he turned out. I told her not to talk like that, that she could easily live into her 90's. She said that would be doubtful. I said "Mom, then if you feel that way...would you please look out for us in heaven". She reached out her hand to me and said "Always". I had a heavy heart to think that my Mom might not be around one day. But, I refuse to look at it that way and enjoy what we do have right now.
I am very close to my MIL too. I always thank her and Bruce (his dad before he died) for being such a wonderful mother to my husband. Because she turned out the most amazing man. I will forever be thankful for that.
So....I ask the question...what do Mothers look like? Every woman.