In every case scenerio, there are two sides of the coin. In my life right now that is most definitely true. I don't think anyone can truly prepare you for the life changing event of an adoption. The same being said for having a baby. Or any life changing event. Most people like to sugar coat things. And then when reality hits, we are all ill prepared. Now...in saying that, we go back and forth between having blissful moments to complete "shock and awe" moments. Nikolai has an extreme attachment to B and I. I have to say that is great news. He is very attached to us and is growing attached to his sisters. He even babble talks to Lilly (our bulldog). He is getting so integrated into our home that he is now a finicky eater and knows how to throw a temper tantrum when you don't let him go into a room that he shouldn't (dining room with all of the glasses). The great news is that he loves us and loves where he is.

But, the other side of the coin is... he is horrified of anyone else that comes near him if we are not holding him. And if we are holding him, he will still scream....just not as severe. I can't leave from the TV room to the kitchen without a shrill. Those rooms are connected...I just happened to be out of his eye sight for 2 seconds.

I thought I had the answer today and put him in the Hip Hugger. The one that you put your baby in and your arms are free. He liked it in Russia, but, now that he has had some freedom....can we say TICKED OFF??! He screamed at the top of his lungs to get down in the store today and his sister began taking everything off of the shelves while I was trying to buy our daughter S class gifts. M even layed straight down on the floor and never moved. A full blown temper tantrum. It was a Kodak moment. I must have had that smile on that says "I am trying people"

The other side of the coin is that I haven't felt well since I have been back. Which is soooo frustrating since in Russia, I felt so alive and renewed. Well...I got the call today and I tested positive for H Pylori. Doc says it could have come from Russia (or so he thinks). So, now I am on 2 major antibiotics 2 times a day and a Stomach Acid Reducer. Supposedly, you can pick up H Pylori in contaminated food or water. So, now, i have to call the pediatrician and tell them. They said if I tested positive, that they would have to test Nikolai. I am very upset about it actually. I have been so sick to my stomach for a while and now 2 different sets of antibiotics twice a day...good lord...I will never be able to get right!! At least I won't feel like eating and I definitely can stick to the South Beach Diet. Which by the way, I have lost 8 lbs this week... YEA!!! The doctor ran another test called an ANA (Anti Nucluear Antibody). I have tested Highly positive 4 times now. This is the 4th time. It is a test that can help you determine an autoimmune disorder. I have so much joint pain, but, the other tests come back fine. This doctor wants to do more research on me. He is running even more tests. I feel like a lab rat. And poor Nikolai is the same way, they are running tests on him for various things. It is frustrating...but, I have to say...thank the good lord we live near good doctors!!

And back to the positive side of the coin...B has been so good with the kids (as always) and so good around the house. He is such a supportive and wonderful husband. I love him so much. The kids scream so loud when he walks in the door and they are so excited. Sometimes, I am like "Hello??? I just cleaned your poop all day, and fed you and took care of you". But, I don't mind...because it is the sweetest picture.

And our oldest will be 6 years old in 2 days. And she is graduating from her class next week. I can't believe our little baby is growing so quickly. Soon, it will be graduating from High School before we know it!!!

So, I guess my advice for every new parent or parent again is just to roll with the punches. Because what your normal was before.... is gone. You have a new normal now and trying to find that balance is going to take some time. Have patience, and lean on your support group. You will need them. And also ask your friends for forgiveness if you have been out of touch. Because things will be crazy for a while. :) That goes for my blogger friends too...I will be catching back up on everyone's blogs and commenting. Sorry about that.

But with the bad, comes the good. Although I have been under the weather... I have also been the most active that I have ever been. I held true to my word that I would make changes in that area of my life. I have written 7 more pages to my screenplay in the last week. And trust me, that is a huge accomplishment with everything going on.

One last thing...don't forget to laugh. When things get crazy...just laugh. It helps the soul, it helps your stress....and besides, it is something that I love to do. B and I have done a lot of laughing lately with all the madness. I couldn't imagine it any other way.

Hope you all have an awesome Memorial Day Weekend!!!